Late Saturday night I saw a message on my Instagram from Juliet Levine (@journeyof juliet), a sound healer and reiki practitioner. I’ve attended two of her sound healing sessions at The Lab yoga studio, and she thought the event on Sunday, that she was co-leading with yoga and meditation teacher and ceremony guide Aryn Evans (@arynevans and @wildhuman.co), might be right up my alley. She was right!

The event was a new moon ceremony with notes of sound healing, yin yoga, meditation, reiki, and a cacao ceremony. Cacao is pronounced cuh-cow. No, it’s not what the fox says. It’s simply pure chocolate! But what the fox is a cacao ceremony? To be honest I’d only heard of it because of a scene in season five of the show Grace and Frankie. The episode was aptly titled The Ceremony.

Grace, at the prodding of her boyfriend Nick, joins Frankie and her love interest Leo in a cacao ceremony. The four gather together in Leo’s yurt and are instructed, by Leo, to write out intentions for their lives. If you’ve seen the show, you know that the reluctant Grace soon creates tension and has an argument with Frankie, and so the rest of the show continues.

Cacao ceremonies come from Central and South America where cacao is grown. Essentially, you gather in a group and drink a cup of chocolate. The cacao, pure chocolate before it has been processed and sweetened for the chocolate and cocoa products most of us are familiar with, can be used as a plant medicine. And in this way, in ceremonial contexts, it has been used to bring wisdom and open the heart. In Grace and Frankie, Frankie, the free spirit of the show, did the ceremony because she was searching for meaning. In the description of the event I attended the ceremonial grade cacao was described as a “powerful antioxidant for the body, and a transformative plant medicine that […] improves blood flow and circulation, and aids in moving stagnant energy in the body.” Is all that true? I’m not sure. But a thing I know about magic is that if you enter into it with doubt then you are certainly doomed to fail. So I purchased a ticket for the event with hope in my heart that I would be moved and transformed and that the places within me where I feel stuck would be opened.

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Sunday morning came. The event was going to take place in a room in the Flat Iron Arts Building in Wicker Park/Bucktown at noon. In Juliet’s sound healing sessions she typically has attendees say out loud what we wish to let go of and call in. I followed that same formula to figure out what I most wanted out of the event, and recited that intention to myself all morning.

I wanted to breathe out the fear of the unknown, and breathe in the joy and excitement of new experiences.

The event started with all participants settling in on yoga mats that faced towards the center of the room. We all introduced ourselves and what brought us there. Then we began. What followed was two hours of mostly visualization, meditation, a lot of lying down, and a little bit of yoga. Near the beginning we sat up straight, closed our eyes, and visualized that white light and energy was entering through the top of our heads and that roots were extending from our seats into the Earth. Then we were instructed to let go of all that no longer serves us, and to see it dropping down. I saw in my mind a glass of clear water with dirt in it. All of the dirt was slowly, peacefully, drifting down to settle at the bottom of the glass. Later, during the sound healing and reiki sections, I kept visualizing black coffee when creamer is poured into it. I saw a deep blackness and slowly, delicate strings of cream and light extended down over my vision and swirled about; chasing out the darkness.

The cacao part of the ceremony wasn’t as hippie dippie as you might expect, either. It had a little moment, admittedly, as we were supposed to hold each cup as it was passed around the circle to it’s intended recipient, and focus our love into the cup. We all received a cup full of love, cacao, a little bit of cayenne, and something else I can’t remember. We all took a sip together. It was definitely bitter, and needed some of the honey that was passed around soon after. Whether by cautiousness or design, I didn’t add enough honey to cut all of the bitterness, but it felt more authentic that way. Life, and love, can be bitter.

The lessons I received were my biggest takeaways, though. Aryn, the woman who prepared the cacao, had told us that everything, Mercury retrograde and the new moon in Pisces, were all about new beginnings and fresh starts. She told us that the universe supports us, and that this was a good time to try new things and start creative projects. This week I begin my immersion into religion, so I really felt that part. After things wrapped up Aryn gave us the opportunity to pull cards from her The Wild Unknown Animal Spirit deck. I pulled the Dragonfly and the Crow. (If things like astrology, tarot, animal affinities, and the like aren’t your thing, feel free to jump out at this point.)

The first card I pulled was the Dragonfly, which is described in the accompanying guidebook, by Kim Krans, as a “master of light, illusion, and the mind.” “The Dragonfly is a symbol of the mind—as it is always moving, shifting, shimmering, and changing. When the Dragonfly card appears, it’s worth considering the quality of your mind and perception. […] The Dragonfly reminds us to calm the mind so the light of wisdom can shine through” (Krans 163). The Crow, which was my second card, is described as “spiritually strong, creative, [and] watchful.” “Those with Crow tendencies must balance their life with a healthy diet, joyful friends, and regular self-study” (Krans 159). Both of these creatures fall under Air, which is typically associated with thought, so it makes sense that both of these deal with the mind. I found it extremely moving that the cards picked up on the head space that I was in; I entered this week, and the event, with a lot of things churning in my mind. I wanted to shift from fearful to joyous and excited when encountering new things. I am preparing myself, with a large dose of apprehension mind you, to experience Lent as a Catholic. So these cards nailed my emotional world perfectly. It’s described in the guidebook that to bring Dragonfly into balance I need to “focus on the breath” (Krans 163). This month I have been attending yoga classes at the The Lab. (My first foray into yoga.) For those unfamiliar with yoga, there is an emphasis on the breath; poses are held for a certain number of breaths, and in one restorative yoga class I was taught about ujjayi breathing. Ujjayi breath, referred to as “victorious breath” or “oceanic breath,” is a way of breathing that increases oxygen in your blood, and according to my one teacher, helps unblock your throat chakra. (Read more on ujjayi breath here.) As for Crow, I need to engage in a “daily meditation practice” to bring that into balance (Krans 159). I’m not doing that yet, but I have been trying to meditate more as I’ve always found peace and light through that practice. So it seems that even when it comes to my physical life, the cards nailed it.

The whole experience of the cacao ceremony on the new moon during Mercury retrograde with the yoga, sound healing, meditation, and the cards I pulled was extremely powerful and impactful to me. I could feel the energy propelling me forward. And my heart felt full of support and love from the universe as this spiritual journey of mine finally becomes real this week.

If you’ve made it this far, I wish you love, healing, and peace as you take on new challenges and encounter new possibilities in all the areas of your life. Love and light. Namaste.